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Saturday, September 18

Guide on how to be a lala.

Warning : Viewer's Discretion Advised. Content may be harmful to eyes and may ruin reputation. Do not save pictures because it may contaminate your computer and kill it. Thankyou very much.

There is one thing on the internet that I hate most and thats, LALA MUISMany people asked, what is a lala ? Well this blog post is about what the term LALA is to me.

How to be Lala

#1 Always use your phone camera.
No matter how bigasspro your dSLR is, to qualify a lala, you must use your handphone regardless how much the megapixel is.
Must show everyone your phone also ar don't forget !

#2 Camwhore in the toilet.
No matter you're at the cinema/mcd/restaurant/school, always, camwhore in the toilet cos thats like the main camwhoring place.
Oh and btw hor, lalas don't care if their picture got one big and ugly toilet bowl one, as long as they think they cute enough can liao :)
#3 Forget all the color coordinations, mix up EVERY COLOR.
The more colors you have, the more attention you get you know ! So don't forget, you can wear a bright pink tee with bright green jacket and a pair of bright purple pants also no problem !

#4 Act as cute as you can.
Rule number one to be a lala is you HAVE TO POUT.
must be as cute as you can ma ! and also must do the asian pose.

Did you know this pose also means fuck you ?

Can camwhore when you lie down also ! Super cute one .___.*vomits*

#5 Camwhore with everything you think is cute.

Like your hair band

or Shin Chan(omg Shin Chan is NOT cute, i hate him D:)

kitty chan also very cute. Got spongebob tim

#6 You have to speak a language people don't understand.

Example :
"HeRrO ! mAiI nAmE Iz ShUwEn, NaIs tUuh mIiIt EuUzxHzz"
omg how they actually read that ? I spent SO LONG just to type that -.-"


#7 Have 123879435230 friends on facebook and know none of them.
Friend list should also consist mainly of boys because most boys like lalamuis. Or is it lalamuis are good in flirting idk la !

#8 Have illogical fashion sense
Ever heard of fashion sense that doesn't make sense ?
Oh hey ! I'm going to the Thursday market and its 30celcius in Malaysia now !
Wear beanie/boots/earmuffs if you have them too :)


Yes that is a windbreaker

and yes that is a very ugly floral hat.

and yes that is me uglifiying myself.

#9 Edit ALL YOUR PICTURES
Most lalas like to edit their pictures and make their skin look flawless. Sometimes I think they're very the pro lor, I can't even do that !
WHO NEEDS PHOTOSHOP ? google for all the cheap photo editings and put as many cliparts on it as you can. Mosaic the background uglily so that you will stand out too.

#10 Put captions that doesn't make sense
Most common caption used is 'Jian jian dan dan xiang ge xiao hai'. Every lala I know uses it, and because I'm not a real lala, I have no idea where they find those captions. I only know photoshop. Damn noob la can !Take me to your heart
Aiyo why want go my heart ? I go toilet pee first can ar ?

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Is this post sarcastic enough ? :) Visit Friendster if you're interested to know more about lalas. This post is only meant to be a joke. I am NOT LALA, and yes this post is very ugly. I'm sorry if I made you puke all over your keyboard.

If you think I'm being ridiculous and say nobody wears a windbreaker to the market, you should go to the market more.
There ARE people who wear boots + beanie + jacket walking under the hot sun in a hot market eating hot kebab. NO KIDDING

Its actually healthy to laugh at yourself once in a while :)
I aMm GoOiNg tUuH EaT lUnchH nAoZxhz. BaIiI BaiIiI~~

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHA!!! I totally wanna laugh+muntah all over my monitor larh!! GOSH!!

` Yi Han said...

HAHA NICE POST! ;D

Natasha Ting said...

OMG nice post thumbssss up X 100!!! And double omg i'm a lala now only i found out wtf HAHAHA!

Shuwen said...

@anonymous HAHA so i succeeded in making myself ugly ? XDD
@yihan Thanks !
@natasha Thanks ! :D Haha you're better than some la ! Some are seriously.. idk how to say hahaha

zhiying said...

lol..this is so damn funny!!

Observer said...

OMG

KeJia said...

Thumb up!! ^^

CzChooi said...

Hahahah i will learn those steps! xD

stfuamie said...

HAHAHAHAHA effing hilarious! i've heard the terms of 'lala' before in some blogshop, didn't know what it means until now. tq shuwen..hahaha

SAM said...

Haha...nice one...=p

samzkingdom.com

John said...

ahahah. so that is lalamui. that day when they tell me lalamui, i still a bit blur blur about what it is.

Merrinette said...

LOVE THIS POST! <3

Camy said...

AWESOME!!

Kenny Ding said...

Now I only realise that I have many lala friends. Thanks, shuwen. =D

Hilda Milda™ said...

OMG SO TRUE!

Anonymous said...

although this post is full of sarcasm to all those lala's out there, its fun to read! u act as a lala pretty well yourself you know, kudos to you

Ronnie said...

You are fit to become one after this post..hehe !!

Xiaopei said...

Nyahahahahaha! So damn true!

spiderman bit me said...

OMFG! you are a genius! you are SO not a lala! you make perfect sense! *roll eyes* yeah right.

Christy said...

Hhahaha this is so true!

Neko said...

Nice post!